IOTA’s Sudden Fling

The IOTA token, that sly thing, climbed to a multi-month high of $0.2428, a whopping 73% increase from its June low. And, of course, it’s all coinciding with the broader crypto market rally – because who doesn’t love a good party? 🎉

Bitcoin Baron’s Latest Splurge 🤑

As fate would have it, Strategy, his brainchild, now sits atop an unrealized profit of approximately $30 billion, a sum so fantastical, it defies comprehension. It’s as if the cryptocurrency gods have smiled upon him, bestowing upon him a fortune rivaling the great tsars of old. 🤑

Bitcoin Investors are Buying, and Not Selling. Oh No.

According to Glassnode’s X (because who needs a proper name for a social media platform, anyway?) post, wallets with less than 100 Bitcoin are buying up the crypto king at a rate of $2.359 billion per month. Meanwhile, miners are only producing about $1.638 billion worth of new Bitcoin per month 🤑.

Pi Network’s Mainnet Launch: A Tale of Button-Tapping and Unfulfilled Promises

Pi Network’s journey from ambitious Stanford experiment to live blockchain reached a pivotal milestone this past February. The project that promised to democratize cryptocurrency mining through smartphones officially opened its mainnet after multiple delays, enabling external connectivity and potential exchange listings for the first time

Cardano’s Bitcoin DeFi Dream: From Theory to Reality 🚀

“This is not the beginning,” Hoskinson proclaimed, with a flourish that would make any 19th-century bureaucrat envious, “but it’s the midpoint of a very long conversation about how does Bitcoin achieve programmability.” Indeed, the journey began years ago with experiments like Colored Coins and Mastercoin, which were as successful as a certain government inspector’s visit to a provincial town. But now, thanks to breakthroughs like Taproot, BitVMX, and an expanding partner ecosystem, the dream has matured into a reality that is as tangible as a well-cooked borscht.

SharpLink Gaming Goes All-In on Ethereum: $113 Million 💰💰💰 Purchased! 🤑🤑🤑

SharpLink Gaming has made a series of large-scale Ethereum (ETH) purchases in the past 24 hours, investing roughly $113 million, according to EmberCN data. Conducted in two parts, the purchases included 21,487 ETH worth $64.26 million bought through Galaxy Digital and Coinbase Prime on Monday, and an additional 16,374 ETH at $48.85 million on the same day. 

Austen’s Take on XRP: A Wealth Transfer of Our Generation 🌟

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a cryptocurrency. However, in the case of Mr. Tomoya Asakura, CEO of SBI Global Asset Management, it is not just any cryptocurrency, but XRP, which he has deemed “the wealth transfer of our generation.” This declaration, made with all the gravitas of a gentleman of high standing, suggests that the adoption of XRP by banks and financial institutions is not only growing but is poised to flourish even more as its value ascends.

Crypto Week: A Legislative Comedy of Errors 🎭💰

The intra-Republican debate burst into the open late last week when Ohio Republican Warren Davidson warned in a post on X that the sequencing chosen by party leaders could backfire. “Crypto Week next week in the House,” he wrote on 11 July. “The Senate’s GENIUS Act to regulate stablecoins should be amended… Instead, they want to pass it without amendments… Without the CBDC ban, CBDC delivery architecture would be in place, and nothing would protect self-custody. For this reason, I will oppose the GENIUS Act.” Oh, the drama!