Ah, the absurdity of it all! In the land of the rising sun, where sushi meets blockchain, Japan’s own Metaplanet has embarked on a ludicrous spree, gobbling up 1,009 bitcoins-a trifling sum of $112 million, or 16.48 billion yen, if you fancy such trifles. 🍣💸 With this grotesque display of wealth, their hoard now swells to a staggering 20,000 BTC, enough to make even the most stoic samurai blush. 🗡️✨
Behold, the sixth-largest public bitcoin treasury in the world! A title so grand, it might as well be carved into the clouds. 🌩️ Yet, for all their pomp, their stock tumbled 4.10% on Monday morning-a comical twist in this farcical tale. 🤡📉 Meanwhile, their U.S. shares clung to life at $6.11, as if grasping at the last straw in a tempest of greed and ambition.
*Metaplanet Acquires Additional 1,009 $BTC, Total Holdings Reach 20,000 BTC*
– Metaplanet Inc. (@Metaplanet_JP) September 1, 2025
Three months ago, they had but 10,000 BTC-a mere pittance for such titans of industry. Now, they dream of 30,000 BTC by year’s end, a goal so audacious it borders on the absurd. 🌟🤪 To fuel this madness, they plan to raise 130 billion yen ($881 million) through an international share offering, a sum that would make even Gogol’s noses twitch with disbelief. 👃💼
Yet, as they plunge headlong into this crypto abyss, the market shrugs with indifference. Bitcoin, ever the fickle mistress, dipped 1.25% to $107,403, a reminder that even the grandest schemes are but dust in the wind. 🌪️✨ Investors, those eternal optimists, watch with bated breath, wondering if Metaplanet’s ambitions will soar or crash in a spectacular flameout. 🔥🤔
In this theater of the absurd, Metaplanet stands as both hero and fool, a testament to the boundless folly of human ambition. Will they reach their 30,000 BTC goal? Only time-and the capricious gods of crypto-will tell. ⏳🙏
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2025-09-01 11:01