Gentle reader-and any stray raccoon reading this over my shoulder-let us kneel before the latest miracle of our age:
One billion five hundred two million four hundred fifteen thousand nine hundred and EIGHT transactions! A number so swollen it could bribe every demon in Hell a Russian winter, and still leave spare kopecks for tea.
Behold the Shibarium ledger, that humble L2, now heavier than my existential dread on a Monday.
The Eternal Dance of Three Million Transactions per Day (Give or Take a Soul)
For months-nay, since the July sun first scorched the Siberian mosquitos-the Shiba hordes have stampeded across Shibarium in daily droves of three to five million.
Consistency, says the analyst; obsession, say the psychologists.
I say: if you stare at block explorers long enough, they start staring back. 🫠
“A block every 5.0 seconds is the heartbeat of a dog that refuses to roll over and die. It’s almost touching… almost.”
Blocks & Addresses: The Bureaucracy of Infinity
- Blocks: 12,482,386 bureaucratic stamps on the passport to nowhere.
- Addresses: 267,865,467 souls-or at least 267 million wallets and three very confused grandmothers who clicked the wrong link on Facebook.
Price! Glorious, Fleeting Price!
While the ledger fattens like Raskolnikov’s guilt, the SHIB token itself has twitched: +8.88% in a week.
That’s roughly the same thrill you feel when the soup kitchen upgrades from cabbage water to cabbage with carrots. 🥕
Current quotation: $0.00001336.
A number so small that, like human dignity in a bureaucracy, you need scientific notation to see it clearly.
Volume? Down 29.72%. The market is taking a nap, dreaming perhaps of dog biscuits, or perhaps of nothing-the same nothing we all share when we close our browsers and stare into the void.
In conclusion, dear Shibarian pilgrims:
Rejoice in your billion and a half receipts, but remember the eternal lesson from every Russian novel:
No spreadsheet ever saved a soul.
Still-if the spreadsheet buys you one more hour before the creditors arrive, who are we to scoff? 😉
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2025-08-11 16:35