OnlyFans vs. Crypto: Which Verification is the Real Pain in the 🍑?

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Well, butter my biscuit and call me confused! Seems like verifying yourself on OnlyFans is about as easy as herding cats in a tornado, while crypto exchanges are practically rolling out the red carpet. 🤷‍♂️ And don’t get me started on the idea that more hassle equals better compliance-that’s about as logical as a screen door on a submarine. 🌪️

Signing up as a model on OnlyFans or Pornhub is like trying to dance the waltz with a bear-awkward, unpredictable, and you might end up mauled. Meanwhile, opening a crypto account is more like a Sunday stroll in the park, complete with birds chirping and sunshine. 🌞 Except the birds are probably just bots, and the sunshine is your dwindling portfolio. 🤑

Both these industries are under the microscope, one to keep the kiddos out of the adult playground, and the other to keep the crooks from laundering their ill-gotten gains. 🕵️‍♂️ But let’s be honest, it’s like comparing apples to hand grenades-both can blow up in your face, but one is slightly more expected. 💥

CryptoMoon decided to test the waters, and boy, did they drown in a sea of red tape. Adult sites are like the gatekeepers of Mount Olympus, rejecting folks left and right with arbitrary rules that make the DMV look like a walk in the park. Meanwhile, crypto exchanges are more like a bouncer at a dive bar-strict but fair, and if you’ve got the right ID, you’re in. 🥳

Verification Process Comparison

KYC in Crypto vs. OnlyFans and Pornhub

OnlyFans verification is like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded-it’s not just an ID and selfie; they want your address, your social media handles, and probably your firstborn child. 🧩 And even then, they’ll reject you because your selfie “doesn’t meet standards,” which is just code for “we felt like it.” 😤 CryptoMoon tried, failed, and tried again, only to be met with the digital equivalent of a shrug. 🤷‍♀️

Pornhub? They rejected CryptoMoon’s application with a mysterious “other” reason, which is about as helpful as a screen door on a submarine. 🌊 But miraculously, after a media inquiry, the application was approved. Coincidence? I think not. 🕵️‍♂️

Pornhub Verification Process

Joshua Chu, an asset recovery lawyer, tried his luck too. His OnlyFans application was rejected faster than a bad pickup line at a wedding. 💔 Meanwhile, he opened multiple crypto accounts with ease, even in places where they technically shouldn’t be operating. 🤫

Crypto exchanges like Coinbase, Bybit, and Bitget are all about the financials-proof of address, source of funds, and a bank statement that doesn’t look like you’re living off ramen noodles. 🍜 Coinbase even locked CryptoMoon’s application for 24 hours, which is just rude. But hey, at least they eventually approved it. 🎉

Coinbase Verification Process

Bybit and Bitget were like a breeze on a summer day-quick, efficient, and over before you know it. 🌬️ But let’s not forget, these platforms tightened their belts after regulators came knocking with fines bigger than a whale’s wallet. 🐳

Hon Ng from Bitget summed it up perfectly: adult sites are stuck in the Stone Age with manual checks, while crypto exchanges are zooming into the future with eKYC. 🚀 But let’s be real, both industries only got serious about verification after scandals made them look like the village idiots. 🌍

“For crypto exchanges, KYC is a well-charted, globally familiar process; for age verification in adult content, the rules are newer, interpreted differently across jurisdictions and tangled in privacy debates.”

How OnlyFans and Crypto Ended Up with Stricter Verifications

It’s simple, really: both industries were sleeping at the wheel until the regulators showed up with a sledgehammer. Pornhub got a wake-up call in 2020 when the New York Times exposed them, and OnlyFans followed suit in 2021 when the BBC found minors on the platform. 📰 Meanwhile, crypto exchanges were fined into submission for letting money launderers run wild. 💰

Regulatory Pressure on OnlyFans

Today, verifying yourself on an adult site is like running a marathon with hurdles, while crypto exchanges are more like a 100-meter dash. 🏃‍♂️ But don’t be fooled-more hoops don’t always mean better security. OnlyFans still hasn’t explained why CryptoMoon’s application was rejected, which is about as transparent as a brick wall. 🧱

In the end, both industries learned their lessons the hard way, and now we’re stuck with stricter checks that are about as fun as a root canal. But hey, at least we’re (hopefully) keeping the bad guys out. 🛡️

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2025-09-05 17:16