Since Ethereum decided to play god and invent smart contracts, it’s been like the blockchain version of a toddler with a crayon-everyone’s drawing their own masterpiece. Suddenly, we’re drowning in Layer 1s (L1s) like “ultra-fast transaction oasis” or “interoperability utopia,” all while Ethereum yawns and says, “I did this in 2015.” But hey, who needs originality when you can just… raise $350 million and call it a day? 😂
According to DeFiLlama, there are now 470 blockchains out there-enough to fill a zoo with monkeys all claiming to juggle bananas. Yet, only 55 have TVL (Total Value Locked) above $100 million. Translation: Most of these chains are just crypto’s version of a haunted house-everyone’s invested, but no one’s home. 🏚️👻
This isn’t just a numbers game; it’s a full-blown identity crisis for alt L1s. Are we witnessing a thriving ecosystem or a $350 million trainwreck? Buckle up, because we’re diving into the existential dumpster fire that is alternative blockchains. 🔥
The Uproarious Crisis for Layer 1 Blockchains
The phrase “L1 Crisis” hit the spotlight like a DeFi influencer at a Bitcoin meetup. The big question? Are chains like Aptos, Berachain, and Sui the next Ethereum, or the next “remember when we all thought Dogecoin was a joke?”
The Aptos Conundrum
The saga began when X user 0xhantengri dropped a viral bomb: “Aptos raised $350 million… and now they’re trying to figure out how to pay rent. Classic!” 🏭💸 With TVL plummeting from $753M to $539M and daily fees dropping to $1,981 (because who needs money when you’ve got vision?), Aptos is the crypto version of a startup selling “revolutionary paperclips.”
As hantengri quipped: “Can’t name a single app that people actually use. Zero.” And there it is-crypto’s version of a ghost town, where the only residents are wash traders and developers still waiting for their airdrop. 🎃
aptos
raised $350m three years ago
no one uses it except aptos gcr and a few of his cousins
it’s just a wash trading hub
can’t name a single app that people actually use
zero
– hantengri (@0xhantengri) November 11, 2025
Hantengri’s sarcasm is so sharp it could cut through a crypto bear market. And honestly, it’s the truth: many alt L1s are just VCs throwing money at a wall and hoping something sticks. 🏹
The Broader Scale
Aptos isn’t alone in this “raise money, don’t build anything” club. Eldar, another X user with a vendetta, declared war on the entire alt L1 army: “Berachain is dead, Sui is dying, Plasma is probably dead… Can we stop with the useless blockchains?” 🪦
So @berachain is dead @SonicLabs is dead@Aptos is dying @SuiNetwork seems like it is also dying @Plasma looks like it might be starting to dye @stable @monad are dead on arrival.
Can we stop with useless alt L1?
– Eldar (@eldarcap) November 11, 2025
But wait! Here’s the twist: Berachain’s TVL hit $3.4B last week, and Sui/Aptos saw $1B in DEX volume. Is this a comeback, or just crypto’s version of a zombie apocalypse? 🧟♂️
The Innovation Paradox
Some alt L1s are trying to innovate. Sonic Labs, which raised $150M for “U.S. expansion” (read: hiring lawyers), and Monad, which claims to process transactions faster than your grandma sends texts, are giving it their best shot. But let’s be real: If you can’t explain your blockchain’s USP without using words like “gasless” or “EVM-compatible,” you’re in trouble. 🤷♂️
And yet, the ROI on these projects is about as exciting as watching grass grow. Aptos spent $350M and now makes $30K a day. That’s like buying a yacht and living in a tent. 🛶⛺️
Do We Need More Blockchains?
Here’s the million-dollar question (literally): Do we need more L1s? Ethereum’s Layer 2s are solving scalability like it’s 2015 again, and Solana’s devs are still out here doing cartwheels. Meanwhile, alt L1s are stuck in a loop of “pre-launch hype” and “airdrop nostalgia.” If a blockchain can’t sustain users, it’s just a digital museum exhibit. 🏛️
On the bright side, diversity breeds chaos! Projects like Sui (with its Move language) and Berachain (proof-of-liquidity? Sure, why not?) are throwing spaghetti at the wall. If they stick, great! If not, at least we’ll have a ton of bad jokes about liquidity. 🍝
The Path Forward
To survive, alt L1s must ditch the VC circus and build something people actually use. Hyperliquid, for example, went from zero to hero by focusing on real-world problems. If you can’t solve a problem, at least make it look cool in a pitch deck. 📊✨
Transparency is key. If you’re not updating your roadmap, the market will update your Twitter bio for you. And collaboration? Let’s stop fighting over the blockchain throne and start building bridges-literally. 🌉
Aptos and its friends are at a crossroads. With millions in the bank and a war chest full of hope, they could either become crypto’s next success story or join the pantheon of “remember when?” Either way, the next few months will be a rollercoaster. 🎢
So, will these L1s prove their worth, or will they become the cautionary tale of crypto’s golden age? The answer isn’t in the funding-it’s in the apps. And if those apps are just “NFT pixel art,” we’re all doomed. 🎨💣
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2025-11-15 15:04