If Your Altcoins Were Parties, They’d Be Dead 🥳 – The Cryptocurrency Comedy of Errors

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In the grand and ultimately baffling ritual known as the cryptocurrency market-an event that unfolds with all the grace of a drunken octopus-you’ll find the usual suspects (ADA and XRP) limping along, their feathers ruffled and their prices heading south like a tourist with a bad map.

Apparently, the whales-those enormous, occasionally friendly giants of the deep-have decided to throw a sale, as if the market needed the equivalent of an ocean-sized yard sale. Recent data suggests that some Cardano whales, who probably think of themselves as the kings of crypto, have casually dumped 440 million ADA in the past month. That’s enough to make you wonder if they’re trying to buy an island or just really dislike their digital porridge.

“440 million Cardano ADA sold in just one month!” -Ali, probably wondering if whales have a secret underwater garage full of tokens.

Meanwhile, ADA’s price has taken a Nosferatu-like plunge, losing more than 23% in the last week, including a charming 17% drop just since last Sunday-because nothing says stability like a rollercoaster ride designed by a mad artist. At this rate, it’s sitting comfortably below $0.48, which, in the world of crypto, is vaguely reminiscent of your lunch money after a particularly reckless weekend.

But hey, don’t despair just yet! A wise analyst (who definitely knows more than your average goldfish) pointed out that some arcane metric called the TD Sequential has flashed a buy signal. It’s probably just trying to lull us into a false sense of security-classic market tactics-but maybe, just maybe, ADA isn’t dead yet. Or at least, it’s taking a very long nap.

XRP’s Circus Act

If you thought ADA was dramatic, XRP is throwing a full-blown circus into the mix. Ripple whales have been selling so aggressively that CryptoPotato reports they offloaded a staggering 1.4 billion tokens in a single 30-day stretch. That’s enough to fill several stadiums with disappointed investors.

In recent days, they’ve dumped another 200 million tokens- worth over $400 million-because, apparently, they’re tired of holding weights that keep sinking the ship. The result? XRP has shed 4% in just 24 hours, and 7% over the week, dropping below that mystical $2.20 threshold, which is apparently where the market’s sense of humor goes to die.

But there’s a twist! Despite all the carnage, the count of whales making transactions over a million dollars each hit 716 daily-by some miracle, this is the highest in four months. This suggests that, even amidst the chaos, someone out there still finds the asset worth shaking fish for. Perhaps it’s the recent launch of a spot XRP ETF in the U.S., which broke the record for first-day trading volume this year and made everyone forget how badly things are bleeding.

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2025-11-16 20:42