You Won’t Believe What Happened To $15B In Crypto! Traders Cry, Cats Dance, Bears Flee

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Key Takeaways

Picture this: overstuffed trading accounts, levitating with bravado, suddenly pulled to earth as BTC and ETH decide to stage a dramatic performance, dragging leveraged hopefuls through the theater of chaos. The audience (sentiment) now hovers between stunned silence and cautious applause. 🤹‍♂️

The crypto bazaar has just concluded an impromptu 48-hour liquidation masquerade. Bitcoin [BTC] and Ethereum [ETH] did not slip quietly—they tumbled, taking with them heaps of Open Interest and, presumably, a small nation’s collective composure.

Imagine brokers in silk hats, monocles askew, shrieking as ceaseless liquidations and a chorus of panic exits spiral prices downward. Markets, apparently, love drama as much as Muscovite theatre!

But hark! The Funding Rates, sullen and bruised, rise again. Prices seek a friendly sofa to recover on—a hopeful tableau, if you squint hard enough between the ruins. 📉😬

Back to back shakeouts as BTC/ETH slides

Two days, dear reader! In that slender sliver of time, ETH’s Open Interest unraveled to the tune of almost $10 billion, with BTC tossing a further $5 billion into the abyss.

That painstaking pyramid of Futures accumulation—gone! Weeks of effort, erased in a blur faster than a government inspector at Berlioz’s apartment.

Such a swift collapse of leveraged fantasies—what else but a ballet of forced liquidations and mad, feverish sprints for the exits?

To add lemon juice to paper cuts, the ETH/BTC ratio, which waltzed so confidently through July, lost its footing and slipped from 0.0325 to 0.0307, pausing in confusion like a bureaucrat confronted by the supernatural.

Funding Rates flip and recover

August 1st: An ill omen! Funding Rates on Binance pirouetted into the negative—a spectacle rarely sighted outside black magic circles. ETH dipped to -0.006%, BTC to -0.003%. The shorts, smelling metaphorical blood, paid dearly simply to remain on stage. 🎭

Such inversion—an invitation to the long squeeze cotillion! Yet, by August 2nd, the Funding Rates returned from the underworld, dusting off their coats and looking moderately less sinister across exchanges.

Lo and behold, BTC’s aggregated funding tips up to +0.0042, and ETH, ever competitive, rises to +0.0063. Applause. 🍾

This renaissance hints, ever so slyly, that the odyssey of bearishness might be ending—perhaps now a new squeeze ball awaits! Polka, anyone?

Liquidation zones light up the charts

Any respectable supernatural novel has its hotspots—and so does crypto. The Liquidation Heatmaps now glow like fevered foreheads: bright yellow at $117K for BTC and $3600 for ETH on August 2nd. Here, ambitious longs met their incorporeal destinies, as if visited by pesky talking cats with ill intent. 🐾

Price now lounges beneath these hurly-burly zones, not only because Fibonacci whispers so, but because human psychology is as resistant to change as a Muscovite tram conductor.

Good news (or at least, less catastrophically bad): below the resting price, liquidation bands go missing, as if magicked away, hinting the worst is past. 🎩

Yet, every upside journey must cross the haunted ruins where traders once believed. Resistance, both technical and existential, now lives in those zones. Should you enter? Only if you bring garlic, a lucky coin, and an appreciation for the absurd.

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2025-08-03 11:07