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In a rather charming X statement on Thursday, the good people at Ethena admitted that they’d been met with a bit of grumbling from the community. Some naysayers had raised concerns about the whole ‘not being a Hyperliquid-native’ thing. Quite the sticky wicket, I dare say! But in a show of magnanimity, Ethena decided to step aside and let the chaps at Native Markets have their turn at the front of the queue. Ah, competition-what a noble thing!

So here we are, folks. HBAR has dusted itself off after flirting with disaster (looking at you, rejection at $0.30) and is ready to strut its stuff again. It’s like that friend who always bounces back after a breakup-they’re fine, they swear! Except in this case, instead of ice cream therapy, HBAR has SWIFT testing it for cross-border payments. Talk about a glow-up 💁‍♀️.

Stablecoins started as a little hack to make crypto traders’ lives easier. Imagine a token that’s pegged to the US dollar, making liquidity in a market that never sleeps just a tad bit more bearable. Fast forward a few years, and what do we have? A full-blown onchain financial ecosystem where dollar-pegged coins are the bosses – setting prices, collateral norms, and determining just how risky we want our digital lives to be. Well, that escalated quickly.

Now, why is this so important? Well, as the SEC’s XRP docket enters its dramatic final act, there’s a whole bunch of “endgame” dates clustered together, all demanding a verdict. Under Section 19(b)(2) of the Exchange Act, once proceedings begin on a 19b-4 proposal (and let’s face it, those names are a real party starter), the SEC has up to 180 days to make up its mind. Plus, they can add a single 60-day extension, which they have done here, because who doesn’t love a good deadline? And that’s why the Nov. 14 date is so significant. It’s not just a delay in the everyday sense. No, no. It’s a hard deadline, a ticking clock, a digital guillotine, if you will.

Chainlink’s native token LINK (LINK), much to the delight of its holders, crossed the $24 threshold, advancing 2.5% on Thursday. This delightful news comes as the oracle provider, with the elegance of a seasoned performer, revealed a joint project with DigiFT and UBS to automate tokenized fund operations in Hong Kong. 🎭🎉

On the fateful day of September 8, Bitchat recorded a staggering 48,781 downloads in Nepal, a figure that constitutes a titillating 39% of its global embrace. One might say the app has become the belle of the ball, albeit a ball thrown in the face of authority. 🎭

Let us not be fooled, dear reader. The great whales are fleeing, clutching their precious profits after Cardano graced the $0.80 zone. It seems these behemoths of the sea have come to the conclusion that the price has soared high enough for them to *book their profits*-perhaps before they reach the unfortunate realization that *maybe*, just *maybe*, they sold too soon? One must never be too cautious when you have the potential to regret everything. 🍷

Breaking through the $0.245 barrier, this playful creature now gazes with newfound ambition, eyes glinting with dreams of $0.3 and beyond. One might wonder – is DOGE merely frolicking, or is it preparing a charge worthy of a battlefield? Come, let us unravel this enigma together in a coin analysis worthy of a Tolstoyan tragedy… or perhaps a comedy.

“Why, yes,” says our learned expert, “I prefer to focus on market cap over the fickle dollar price, for, as we all know, XLM’s supply dynamics do love to play a trick or two with one’s expectations.” A sly remark indeed! And, as for the numbers, he unveils that while the dollar price has been positively *meh*-up only a mere 12,000%-the market cap chart has soared by a staggering 52,000%. Could this suggest that inflationary pressures are at work? Perhaps. Certainly, it seems wise to examine the market cap chart for more insight into the unfolding drama. 📈

President Trump called it a “dark moment for America” and promised to find those responsible.