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In a post upon the modern agora called X, a figure named Tenten speaks with the gravity of one who has watched men gamble with the weather. She asserts that Sun employed the identities of several employees based in Beijing to operate accounts on Binance, with which the TRX price was maneuvered as if by some invisible hand of destiny. She says he conducted aggressive and large-scale sales at the end of 2017 and the dawn of 2018, as though wealth could be harvested by the scythe of cunning rather than by honest labor. The crowd cheers; the sage nods; and the rest of us wonder whether the edge of a blade is sharper when wielded in a bull market or when described in a tweet.

One cannot help but marvel at the audacity of it all. SoftBank, already knee-deep in OpenAI with a $41 billion December investment for an 11% stake, is doubling down on Masayoshi Son’s “all-in AI strategy.” A strategy, one might add, that seems as much about hope as it does about logic. For what is AI but the modern-day alchemy, promising to turn silicon into gold?

But wait, there’s more! BitRiver hasn’t just stumbled; it’s face-planted into a pile of troubles. Facilities? Shut down. Management? Fled faster than a cockroach under a spotlight. Creditors? Suing like there’s no tomorrow. It’s a regular circus, minus the popcorn and laughter. And let’s not forget the cherry on this crumbling cake: founder Igor Runets, the man who once rode the crypto wave like a tsar, is now under house arrest, charged with tax evasion. Oh, the irony! From mining bitcoins to mining excuses, what a downfall!

Will the dip buyers, those loyal courtiers, rush to her aid, or shall she be left to the mercy of the bears? The next few acts promise drama-a daily close below $98, and the curtain may fall on a tragedy of deeper losses. Oh, the suspense! One can almost hear the whispers: “Will she hold? Or shall we witness the grand finale of a once-proud asset?”

At this very hour, the token findeth itself in a critical demand zone near $0.6240, a place where many a rejection hath occurred, like a suitor spurned at the altar. Yet, like moths to a flame, buyers may soon flock, lured by the siren song of a dip, as the selling pressure cools its fiery breath.

But wait-just two days earlier, Laser Digital was all like, “Hey, USA, can we be a bank now?” Spoiler alert: they’re not confused. They’re just strategic. Or maybe they’re just really good at multitasking. Who knows?

Here’s the lay of the land, old sport.

Bitcoin’s latest slide repeats an old show: probability gauges drift downward while derivatives traders scramble for shelter, much like a prisoner trying to hide behind a broom closet as the guards pass by. As $75,000 puts swell and hundreds of millions in long bets vanish, prediction markets show only a polite erosion of upside conviction, as if the end of the month might absolve all sins with a neat signature.

In a charming duet by Coinbase and Glassnode-think of it as the crypto prophets’ collective therapy session-they declared that the market, after a rugged quarter, is sprucing itself up for a healthier 2026. Turns out, excess leverage, that pesky debt monster, was mostly flushed out during the last act. The on-chain technical indicators, like the entity-adjusted Net Unrealized Profit/Loss (NUPL), whispered that investor sentiment, once exuberant during the “Belief” phase, had tumbled into “Anxiety,”-a perfect mood for a crypto soap opera.

So, guess what? The price of SHIB has dropped by a whopping 0.17% in just 24 hours. I mean, wow! Call the press!