Shocking News: Function Raises $10M for Wild Bitcoin Adventure! 🚀💰

Function, formerly known as Ignition (because rebranding is like a mid-life crisis for companies), has thrown a party for this cash infusion. They even invited Antalpha and Mantle to dance along with Galaxy, who are also handing out favors for liquidity provisioning, governance, and making sure nobody spills their drinks on the carpet. 🍹

Why This New Revenue Model for Stablecoins Will Make You Laugh and Cry 😆💸

Rev+, as they call it, claims to be the very first of its kind—a protocol-level program that bequeaths developers, stablecoin creators, and the esteemed decentralized autonomous organizations (DAOs) a bounty based on the value they miraculously bestow upon unsuspecting users. It holds the promise of allowing projects to profit from the gas fees generated by those most curious blockchain applications. Perhaps even the dearly departed will rise from the grave for a share! 👻

Token Launchpads: The Great Equalizer or Just Another Exclusive Club?

The report, which analyzed performance data and user-access structures across leading centralized and decentralized launchpads from January to June 2025, found that centralized exchanges (CEXs) continue to dominate in token volume. However, they often favor users with deep pockets or staked holdings, leaving the rest of us mere mortals out in the cold.

Whales Buying the Dip: XRP Price Predictions That’ll Have You Questioning Your Crypto Strategy

Now, the real juicy part isn’t the drop, it’s that oh-so-narrow volatility range ($2.82–$2.87) where trading volume has decided to throw a party. Analysts are practically drooling over this, saying it’s not just noise—nope, it’s a signal of high-volume players doing their thing while preparing for some bigger-than-you-thought move. Hold onto your wallets, people.

Gogol’s Take on Ripple’s Price Surge: A Tale of XRP’s Potential

And so, in the spirit of inquiry, we turned to the wise and all-knowing Gemini, Google’s AI chatbot, to divine the future of $XRP. Lo and behold, the oracle spoke, and it was said that by the year 2025, the token might reach a technical target of $6.27. A figure that, when compared to its current price of $2.85, promises returns that would make even the most stoic investor crack a smile. 🤑

Vanguard Quietly Joins the Bitcoin Party – Who Knew?

It seems Vanguard, the folks who’ve long scoffed at digital gold, now hold more than 20 million shares in Strategy Inc. That’s a company with a treasure chest of over 600,000 Bitcoin tucked away—enough to make Scrooge McDuck envious. This little stockpile gives Vanguard nearly 8% ownership in Strategy Inc., putting them on a collision course to overtake Capital Group as Strategy’s top institutional investor. Who’d have thought? 🤑

Jerome Powell’s Week of Woes: Crypto’s Golden Opportunity? 🤑

The tension is set to peak as the Consumer Price Index (CPI) inflation data for June is released today. Last month, May’s CPI came in at 2.4%, a slight uptick from April. Now, the experts, with their crystal balls and spreadsheets, predict that June’s CPI might rise to 2.6%. However, if inflation surprises to the downside, falling below 2.4%, it could give the Federal Reserve the green light to cut interest rates sooner. Lower interest rates, you see, would likely pump more liquidity into the markets, giving a strong boost to risk assets like cryptocurrencies. 📈