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On Thursday, the ever-optimistic investor and analyst Will Clemente tweeted on X (yep, that’s still a thing) that “the vibes in the crypto group chats are just sad.” Apparently, the once vibrant crypto crew now feels “jaded, depressed, and defeated.” Who knew investing in crypto could feel like a breakup? đŹ
On October 31, Bitwise filed Amendment No. 4 because apparently four amendments just feel fancier than one. The big reveals? NYSE as the venue (âbecause who doesnât love tickers and Broadway?â) and a 0.34% fee. Eric Balchunas, that SEO-obsessed crypto oracle at Bloomberg, spilled his coffee over the keyboard praising it: âBitwise checked nearly all boxes!â
Currently, our sturdy Bitcoin is battling beneath the $110,000 level, with traders scratching their noggins and hearts wobbling like jelly in a storm. Ever since the Fedâs little dance with the interest rates, folks are all antsy and discordant; volatility has been afoot, and sentiment is more sour than a day-old lemonade. Disappointingly, the sweetness of optimism was chased away faster than a rattlesnake on a hoe. The markets seem to be adjusting their gears after a spell of frenetic speculation and an episode worthy of a Wall Street soap opera in October.
In Q3 2025, Tether minted more USDT than a gold miner on a caffeine binge-$17 billion, to be precise. Thatâs bumped the total USDT supply to $174 billion, which sounds impressive until you realize itâs still just a digital IOU with a fancy hat đŠ. Meanwhile, their treasure chest now holds $135 billion in U.S. Treasuries, making âem richer than South Korea and cozying up to the 17th spot on the global Treasury leaderboard. Fancy!
Despite these fleeting moments of melancholia, Bitcoin remains within a comfortable, albeit tedious, confines. Yet, a critical juncture approaches, wherein the fickle winds of fortune shall determine its fate. Shall it soar to greater grandeur, or descend into the depths of despair? Macroeconomic intrigues, the flow of funds, and the whims of investors shall decide this most crucial matter.
An X account, whimsically named âStellar Rippleâ, has seized upon Schwartzâs words like a magpie on a shiny coin, declaring them a âtruth bombâ-a phrase so overused, yet so fitting for this theater of the absurd. According to this digital herald, Schwartz has cut through the Gordian knot of decentralization, exposing the charade of blockchain networks that masquerade as free yet are, in truth, shackled by their own design. đľď¸âď¸
On October 31st (spooky), Steak ân Shake announced something that sounds like a headline from a future history book: a Strategic Bitcoin Reserve (SBR), which theyâve conveniently paired with Fold Holdings Inc. (because, you know, why not?). The premise? Every time someone buys a meal with Bitcoin, Steak ân Shake tucks that payment away in their SBR, making it the digital equivalent of stuffing cash under a mattress. Plus, you can now earn $5 in Bitcoin by just ordering a specific meal – because who doesnât want their burger served with a side of blockchain?
In a recent missive to his admiring X audience, Mickle opines with the eloquence of a forgotten poet that most crypto enthusiasts remain benighted about XRPâs special qualities. âWhat pitch doth XRP employ?â one might inquire. Alas, the wrong question artfully paraded! For XRP doesnât require such a sales gambit, for its value blooms from the very substratum of existence-the XRP Ledger itself. XRP is not a whimsical flutter in the financial winds, wholly untethered to fleeting frenzy or momentary mythologies. Rather, it nests firmly within the matrix that propels the XRP Ledger-a mighty silk thread in the web of decentralized networks.
Unlike popular exchanges like Coinbase and Kraken that act as middlemen between buyers and sellers, dYdX operates as a decentralized platform. This means users can trade directly with each other on a blockchain network without a central authority controlling their funds. Oh, the irony of freedom! đ§
In a recent X post (formerly known as Twitter, for those still living in the Age of the Mammoth), analyst Lucky-presumably named for his ability to avoid being struck by lightning-shared a chart so detailed it could double as a treasure map. According to this cartographer of coins, Worldcoin has stumbled into a “key demand zone,” where buyers lurk like trolls under a bridge, ready to pounce. đ§âď¸đ°
