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Now, dear readers, let us unwrap this financial bonbon further! Ethereum’s current state is quite the spectacle. Currently priced at an eye-watering $3,872.50 — a modest rise of 1.46% in its 24-hour escapade. Oh, how numbers dance like dervishes at the mere suggestion of a market cap that flirts with the dizzying heights of $468.12 billion! Not to forget that our dear ETH has enjoyed a delightful volatility of only 0.7%. A veritable teddy bear on the tightrope! 🎢

Markus Thielen of 10x Research says patience might pay. In his view, the sweet spot for bullish entries lies around $111,673—Bitcoin’s May high that flipped from resistance to potential support. “We’d prefer to see BTC retest that breakout level to offer a more attractive risk/reward entry point,” Thielen wrote in a Monday note to clients. Sounds like a plan… if you’re not a human being with a heartbeat. 💸

This move could whip up more selling pressure on bitcoin, that stubborn pioneer of currencies, always dragging its heels through market mudslides. But hey, what’s a little more chaos in this rodeo? 🌪️

Ah, Bitcoin. The proverbial giant, standing at a cool $118,000. It shifts by a mere 1% in the last 24 hours, as if the markets are all too weary of dramatic movements. Yet, in this placid dance, a curious thing happens: its trading volume swells by an exuberant 40%. Could this be the market’s way of telling us: “We might be stationary, but we’re watching”? A $65.71 billion trading volume is nothing to sneeze at, I dare say.

In an X post (not to be confused with ‘X-rated’, but, oh well!), Michael shared a snapshot of his Bitcoin portfolio tracker. This bad boy showed that the company now owns a whopping 607,770 BTC. That’s right, folks, they’ve gone from 0 to hero and are flaunting it like they just got an A+ in a college course they didn’t attend. 🏆 He cheekily said, “It all began with a quarter billion in bitcoin.” Just a casual flex to let us know he’s been rolling in it for a while.

In the last day, Ethereum’s been throwing a proper tantrum with price jumps that’d make a kangaroo jealous. Coinglass reports a whopping $124.5 million in ETH positions got wiped out, hitting longs and shorts alike—fair’s fair in love and liquidations, I suppose. This chaos followed a snooze-fest of low volatility, with IntoTheBlock’s data showing ETH’s wild swings calming from a manic 53.9% down to a more sedate 47.6%. Meanwhile, the big fish—whales, if you will—have gone quiet, their transaction volumes plunging from a boastful $21.3 billion to a measly $5.9 billion in a week. It’s like they all decided to take a holiday at once. 😴

Enter our crypto oracle, EGRAG CRYPTO. He’s been practicing prophetic frequency and claims XRP could plummet to a shocking $0.80. How did he get there? Oh, easy peasy! Based on historical price drama and technical reveals that would make a soap opera jealous.

Under the pilot program overseen by the Dubai Virtual Assets Regulatory Authority (VARA), this development provides an opportunity for common investors to utilize sophisticated trading tools.

In a press release dripping with corporate optimism, PayPal President and CEO Alex Chriss declared, “Businesses of all sizes face incredible pressure when growing globally.” Incredible pressure, indeed—like deciding whether to accept PYUSD or just stick to boring old dollars. But fret not, for PayPal is here to “remove these barriers” and help businesses achieve their wildest dreams. Dreams of what, exactly? Becoming trillionaires via Shiba Inu tokens? One can only hope. 🐶

Now, when Joe Kernen, the host, asked Pomp about Bitcoin and Ethereum getting all this attention, Pomp confidently declared that Bitcoin is the king of the market. I mean, who needs a crown when you have a digital coin, right? 👑 He says Wall Street is all about Bitcoin, not Ethereum or those other wannabe altcoins. Sure, Ethereum and Solana are getting some love, but they haven’t hit new highs like Bitcoin. It’s like being the best player on a losing team. You’re still the best, but it’s not saying much.