Bitcoin: The Poor Man’s Rollercoaster to Nowhere?

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So, Bitcoin’s down 30% since January. Big whoop. Meanwhile, Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong’s out here claiming it’s the poor man’s hedge against inflation. Sure, Brian, because nothing says “financial security” like watching your life savings yo-yo like a caffeine-addicted ping-pong ball.

Armstrong dropped this gem on X (because where else would he?) and then doubled down at the World Liberty Forum, hosted by the Trumps. Because, you know, nothing screams “financial wisdom” like a room full of people who’ve never met a tax loophole they didn’t like.

Here’s his logic: Inflation eats cash like it’s a buffet, and rich folks protect themselves with stocks, real estate, and Bitcoin. Poor people? Well, they’re just SOL. Unless, of course, they gamble their rent money on Bitcoin. What could go wrong?

Inflation is a regressive tax on the poorest people in society, since they only hold cash.

Once people have wealth, they can afford and get access to inflation-resistant asset classes (stocks, bitcoin, real estate, etc).

Expanding financial access and opportunities globally to…

– Brian Armstrong (@brian_armstrong) February 23, 2026

A Fair Point, Wrapped in a Terrible Idea

Look, he’s not wrong about inflation being a jerk. Economists have been saying it for years. But Bitcoin as the solution? That’s like saying, “Your house is on fire, so here’s a flamethrower.” Sure, it’s a tool, but not the one you need right now.

Bitcoin doesn’t just dip-it nosedives. 20% in a week? That’s not a hedge; that’s a financial heart attack. For someone living paycheck to paycheck, that’s not protection-it’s a one-way ticket to panic.

The CLARITY Act: Because Crypto Needs More Rules

Now, the one thing Armstrong’s got going for him is the CLARITY Act. Congress is debating it, and apparently, it’s the crypto world’s version of the Holy Grail. Senator Bernie Moreno says it’s coming by April. Because nothing says “urgent” like a government deadline.

Armstrong’s pitching it as a win-win-win for crypto firms, banks, and consumers. Stablecoins are the hot topic-can they offer yields without breaking the bank (literally)? Spoiler alert: probably not.

And then there’s China. They’ve got a government-backed digital currency paying interest. Armstrong’s warning? If the U.S. doesn’t get its act together, we’ll be eating China’s digital dust. Great. Another thing to lose sleep over.

So, is Bitcoin the poor man’s hedge against inflation? Only if you think a rollercoaster is a safe investment. Thanks, Brian. I’ll stick to my piggy bank.

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2026-02-25 18:05