Markets
What to Know: (And Why You Should Care) 🤡
- Asset manager VanEck, the wise old owl of finance, claims mid-cycle miscreants-those sneaky little goblins who last moved coins within five years-are causing Bitcoin’s latest tantrum. 🐍
- The firm says long-term holders remain steadfast, like ancient trees, while open interest and funding levels hint at a futures-market reset. 🌲
- Other analysts blame OGs for selling, October’s “deleveraging disaster,” and offshore trading chaos. A recipe for chaos, indeed! 🧨
Bitcoin’s latest sell-off? A mid-cycle heist! According to VanEck’s “Mid-November 2025 Bitcoin ChainCheck” report, wallets that moved coins in the past five years are the villains. The oldest cohorts? They’re as steady as a rock, even as sentiment turns sour. 🪨
VanEck noted that coins aged over five years are “aging into the cohort,” adding +278,000 BTC over two years. A sign of long-term conviction? Or just a slow, deliberate march toward a cliff? 🚶♂️
The report drops as Bitcoin trades near multi-month lows. BTC’s price? A wobbly tightrope walker, recently at $86,696. Down 3.2% in 24 hours and 31.2% below its October high. A sad tale, truly. 😢
“The biggest drivers? OGs selling, an uncertain economy, and a mass deleveraging event on October 10th,” said Nic Puckrin, CEO of Coin Bureau. “A flood of supply? More like a tsunami!” 🌊
Carol Alexander, a finance professor with a penchant for drama, said Bitcoin’s swings are due to “aggressive trading on offshore platforms.” Professional firms? They’re like mischievous monkeys, tossing bananas (or BTC) into the air. 🐒
VanEck’s report also highlights a reset in speculative positioning: open interest in Bitcoin perpetuals has dropped 20% in BTC terms. Funding rates? Back to “washed-out” levels. A deja vu for the crypto crowd. 🔄
VanEck says the combo of long-term stability, cohort rotation, and futures-market chaos leaves Bitcoin in a “reset” state-a prelude to rebounds. Or a prelude to a very long nap. 🛌
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2025-11-21 01:35