Oh, bloody hell, Bitcoin‘s done it again 🤯. It’s smashed through the $112K barrier like it’s nobody’s business, because, let’s be real, it’s not like anyone actually understands how it works 🤷♀️. A new all-time high of $112,702.74, because who needs a social life when you can just watch cryptocurrency prices all day? 📊
Apparently, this is the first time it’s reached these dizzying heights since May, because who can keep track of time when you’re too busy refreshing your crypto wallet? 🕰️ It’s now up 20% this year, which is just a casual $20K or so. No big deal. And to think, it was languishing below $100K just last month. How quaint.
Coinglass (because, of course, that’s a real thing) reported that a whopping $340 million in Bitcoin short positions got liquidated in just four hours. That’s a lot of sad traders who thought they could outsmart the crypto overlords 🤖. Meanwhile, Coinbase Global and MicroStrategy stocks are riding the coattails of Bitcoin’s success, because who doesn’t love a good bandwagon? 🚂
And, because why not, the Nasdaq Composite decided to join the party too, finishing at its own record high. It’s like the whole stock market is just one big, happy family… until it all comes crashing down, that is 🎉.
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2025-07-10 20:26