Bitcoin’s Lazy Coiling Miracle: The Next Big Booom or Just a Chill Snail?

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Look, Bitcoin‘s been acting like that awkward guy at the party. Started the year flexing in a six-figure tuxedo, then decided to take a nap in the corner, dropping over 30%. Now it’s sitting under $90k like it’s hiding from its own hype. Buzz says it’s bearish, the kind of bearish that makes you want to crawl under your duvet and binge-watch cat videos.

But hold your horses – Merlijn The Trader, the guy who probably drinks his coffee with conspiracy theories, says, “Relax, this isn’t a crash, it’s a coil.” Because why just crash when you can coil? It’s like a slinky getting ready to spring back, only less funny and more financially terrifying.

BREAKING:

THIS ISN’T A CRASH.

IT’S A COIL. 💫

Raoul Pal, the oracle of all things crypto, said the magic words: the old four-year cycle? Donezo. We’re now in a liquidity-led supercycle. Apparently, the script for the last decade was: Halving. Supply shock. Retail mania. Top. Winter. Repeat. But now, it’s like we’ve switched to a new playlist-more liquidity, less predictable, and definitely less charming.

Merlijn and Raoul agree: We’re not riding the cycle anymore, folks. We’re surfing the liquidity wave, and corrections are just slingshots. You wanna play it safe? Pretend the old cycle’s still alive. Or, you know, just hold on for the rocket ride that’s already in motion. Buckle up, it’s probably gonna get hot.

Could it hit $600K in 2026? Sure, why not?

Some guy-Wise Crypto-dreams of a $600,000 Bitcoin by next year. Did he say that with a straight face? Probably. His magic ticket involves ending Fed’s tightening nonsense, rate cuts, Treasury tricks, and the mid-term election circus. Basically, if all the planets align and the stars decide to throw a crypto-themed rave, we could be looking at a mountain of cash, or just another joke in the chaos.

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2025-12-19 15:03