Bitcoin’s No Yield? A Shocking Twist!

In a world where everyone is chasing yield like a squirrel chasing acorns, Bitcoin dares to be different. Macro analyst Luke Gromen says it’s not a flaw-it’s a superpower! 🐿️

“If you’re earning a yield, you’re playing a dangerous game,” Gromen told Natalie Brunell, as if explaining to a toddler why candy isn’t a good idea. “Anyone who criticizes Bitcoin for its lack of yield? They’re just jealous of its chill.” 🤭

He then dropped a bombshell: “Remember FTX? Yield so sweet, it tasted like a lie. 💸” 🍬

“Your money in the bank? Pretend it’s yours,” Gromen sneered. “But it’s really the banks’ little secret. 🦊”

Ether’s Proof-of-Stake: A Siren Song?

Ethereum, the charming trickster, lures investors with staking rewards. “It’s like getting a gold star for being a good boy,” one analyst said. 🐍

Meanwhile, Bitcoin’s “digital gold” status remains unshakable. “Sure, it doesn’t pay interest,” Gromen shrugged. “But it’s not trying to sell you a pyramid scheme.” 🏺

The Bitcoin Bullcase

Bitcoin’s public treasuries? A giant piggy bank of $119.65 billion. 🧾

And don’t worry-Bitcoin holders can still earn yield, just not from themselves. “It’s like borrowing a friend’s toaster to make toast,” Gromen joked. 🍞

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2025-09-18 09:38