Oh, how the mighty fall! Fidelity’s Jurrien Timmer, that ardent admirer of chaos, has declared Bitcoin’s momentum a “disproportionate casualty” of market mayhem. One might say it’s the financial equivalent of a toddler learning to walk-except the floor is lava and the toddler is wearing clown shoes 🤡. While gold, that sedate old thing, shields itself as a “safe haven,” Bitcoin flails like a caffeinated squirrel, amplifying risk with the enthusiasm of a man who thinks “leverage” is a type of glitter 💍.
Behold! The chart below reveals gold’s “excellent momentum” amidst correction, while Bitcoin languishes in the realm of momentum outliers. A true Shakespearean tragedy, if only the cryptocurrency had a soliloquy to confess its sins. – Jurrien Timmer (@TimmerFidelity) November 20, 2025
In late 2025, investors are “de-risking” with the grace of a stampede fleeing a stampede. Fear, that old friend, drives liquidity higher while Bitcoin, the poster child of volatility, is summarily tossed out of the party like a guest who brought a deflated balloon to a pool party 😂. The S&P 500 sips tea calmly; Bitcoin chokes on its own steam.
Bitcoin, that fickle lover of cheap money, now shivers as monetary conditions tighten. One might say it’s the financial equivalent of wearing a fur coat in July-delusional and poorly ventilated 🌡️.
Earlier today, Bitcoin plummeted to the tender embrace of $86,000, while altcoins wept into their keyboards. A 31% drop from its October peak? Merely a polite nod to humility. One wonders if it’ll remember how to float again, or if it’ll spend eternity as a cautionary tale for the gullible 😱.
The “digital gold” narrative? A noble endeavor to masquerade as a store of value, only to crumble like a soufflé at a rock concert 🏅. Gold, ever the dignified host, glows serenely in market stress. Bitcoin, meanwhile, trends downward with the subtlety of a neon sign screaming “I’M BROKE!” 🚨
As U.Today so kindly reminds us, Timmer once dared to predict gold would pass the baton to Bitcoin. Alas, BTC’s sharp collapse rendered this prophecy as useful as a screen door on a submarine. Perhaps next time, he’ll suggest Bitcoin try being a “digital sandcastle”-it’s certainly mastered the art of dissolution 🏖️.
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2025-11-20 21:16