To put that into context for those of us whose net worth maxes out at “found a fiver in my coat this morning,” the S&P 500 (think: all the biggest American companies, so all your bad shopping choices in one basket) is worth about $40 trillion. That’s 40% of the global stock market. 😂
Yet fortune—as she so often does—favoured the vigilant. Winkel, astutely suspicious and evidently not one to faint in a crisis, raised the alarm with the promptness of a lady racing to a window to observe an arriving carriage. Law enforcement, for once possessed of both haste and sense, descended upon the highway, where—one must imagine with great theatrics—they intercepted the villains’ vehicle and liberated the distressed lady within. One presumes tea and strong spirits followed. 🍸
To wrangle all this, the company (known as NIP, now standing for “Not Into Pac-Man”) has whipped up a “Digital Computing Division.” Very official, not at all invented over an emergency pizza lunch, and definitely not a name someone’s cat typed during a Zoom meeting. The team’s also tasked with ‘strategic expansion into future crypto ventures,’ which sounds like the business equivalent of “let’s see what happens if we press this big red button.”
Source: Mempool Space
On Friday, July 4, local media reported that the CMB had blocked access to PancakeSwap (CAKE) for the country’s citizens. Along with the DEX, the country also blocked access to the crypto comparison platform CryptoRadar. Imagine that! No more flipping pancakes or radar signals for you, Turkey! 😂
As America shut its illustrious trading floors in celebration of Independence Day, Bitcoin (BTC) partook in the festivities by pretending to be a statue. “Crypto never sleeps,” they say, and yet, Bitcoin appears to have discovered the splendor of a week-long siesta, dozing around $107K with the steadfastness of a marble sphinx. Despite every economic firework lighting up the stock markets, our digital darling remained unmoved, channeling the spirit of that one poet at a party who refuses to dance.
This stablecoin ecosystem has blossomed lately, perhaps out of boredom, perhaps out of love for charts with more green than a Tula summer. Polygon Foundation’s protagonist, Sandeep Nailwal, boasted of over 11.12 million P2P stablecoin addresses in the first half of 2025. To put it another way: more addresses than all of 2022 and 2024, presumably because people need new places for their existential dread—and digital dollars.
And to make sure they don’t do it alone (because who wants to be left hanging?), they’ve teamed up with Fireblocks (yep, that crypto infrastructure giant), Solana Japan (cue the digital hype!), and TIS, a tech company from Japan. Apparently, they’ve got big dreams of turning your bank account into a Web3 wonderland.
On the glorious day of July 4, the team behind the Trump-linked World Liberty Financial (WLFI) launched a pivotal governance vote, a vote that could either be the dawn of a new era or the twilight of a fleeting dream, proposing to unlock tradability for its WLFI token. 🎉🗳️
But, as the saying goes, “what goes up must come down”… or does it? 🤔 Market analysts are divided, like a couple in a Chekhov play, on what’s next for our fine-feathered friend.
