\n
So, Gemini, the crypto exchange founded by those guys who looked really determined in The Social Network (but for Bitcoin), is trying to get into… betting? Apparently, trading Dogecoin wasn’t enough of a gamble for them. They want to launch “regulated prediction markets,” which I think is a fancy way of saying “people will put money on whether it will rain on Tuesday.” ☔️
\n\n
- \n
- Gemini wants to play the “will it happen?” game with your money.
- They’ll be up against companies with names that sound like rejected Star Wars droids (Kalshi and Polymarket).
- Analysts think this is good. Because, you know, more things to lose money on is always a positive.
\n
\n
\n
\n
\n\n
According to Bloomberg – which, let’s be honest, probably already has a pool going on whether Gemini will get approved – they’re waiting for a thumbs-up from the U.S. derivatives regulators. The thought of regulators getting involved in predicting things is, frankly, terrifying. It’s like asking a sloth to oversee a marathon. 🐌
\n
This puts them right in the ring with Kalshi and Polymarket, who are apparently doing a brisk business predicting the 2024 election. Personally, I’m predicting a lot of hot takes, but I doubt you can trade on that.
\n
Gemini’s Next Brilliant Idea
\n
The plan is to let you trade contracts based on… things happening. Sports, politics, the economy. Basically, anything people argue about at Thanksgiving dinner. All they need is the okay from the CFTC, but that’s been stalled thanks to the government shutdown. You know, because nothing good ever happens when the government is actually functioning.
\n
If they do get the go-ahead, they’ll be competing directly with Kalshi, who already has the blessing, and Polymarket, who’s trying to sneak back into the U.S. Like a tiny, digital prodigal son. Robinhood decided it was too much effort and just partnered with Kalshi. Smart. Me? I’d rather spend my money on interesting paperclips.
\n
Beyond the Blockchain 🙄
\n
Gemini went public recently, which-correct me if I’m wrong-seems like a terrible idea at the moment, considering their stock is down 40%. But hey, maybe prediction markets are the answer! “Diversification,” they call it. I call it “desperation.” This is all part of a broader trend of financial firms realizing they can make a profit off our collective anxiety.
\n
Coinbase is getting in on the action too, with their “Everything Exchange” strategy. Which sounds suspiciously like “we’ll take your money for anything.” Even CME Group and Intercontinental Exchange-corporations that sound like they were invented by a committee-are sniffing around.
\n
Gemini’s hoping its reputation for “compliance” (read: following the rules, mostly) will win people over. Because, in the wild world of prediction markets, trust is everything. And let’s be real, it’s probably going to be a bumpy ride. 🎢
\n
So, Gemini, the crypto exchange founded by those guys who looked really determined in The Social Network (but for Bitcoin), is trying to get into… betting? Apparently, trading Dogecoin wasn’t enough of a gamble for them. They want to launch “regulated prediction markets,” which I think is a fancy way of saying “people will put money on whether it will rain on Tuesday.” ☔️
- Gemini wants to play the “will it happen?” game with your money.
- They’ll be up against companies with names that sound like rejected Star Wars droids (Kalshi and Polymarket).
- Analysts think this is good. Because, you know, more things to lose money on is always a positive.
According to Bloomberg – which, let’s be honest, probably already has a pool going on whether Gemini will get approved – they’re waiting for a thumbs-up from the U.S. derivatives regulators. The thought of regulators getting involved in predicting things is, frankly, terrifying. It’s like asking a sloth to oversee a marathon. 🐌
This puts them right in the ring with Kalshi and Polymarket, who are apparently doing a brisk business predicting the 2024 election. Personally, I’m predicting a lot of hot takes, but I doubt you can trade on that.
Gemini’s Next Brilliant Idea
The plan is to let you trade contracts based on… things happening. Sports, politics, the economy. Basically, anything people argue about at Thanksgiving dinner. All they need is the okay from the CFTC, but that’s been stalled thanks to the government shutdown. You know, because nothing good ever happens when the government is actually functioning.
If they do get the go-ahead, they’ll be competing directly with Kalshi, who already has the blessing, and Polymarket, who’s trying to sneak back into the U.S. Like a tiny, digital prodigal son. Robinhood decided it was too much effort and just partnered with Kalshi. Smart. Me? I’d rather spend my money on interesting paperclips.
Beyond the Blockchain 🙄
Gemini went public recently, which-correct me if I’m wrong-seems like a terrible idea at the moment, considering their stock is down 40%. But hey, maybe prediction markets are the answer! “Diversification,” they call it. I call it “desperation.” This is all part of a broader trend of financial firms realizing they can make a profit off our collective anxiety.
Coinbase is getting in on the action too, with their “Everything Exchange” strategy. Which sounds suspiciously like “we’ll take your money for anything.” Even CME Group and Intercontinental Exchange-corporations that sound like they were invented by a committee-are sniffing around.
Gemini’s hoping its reputation for “compliance” (read: following the rules, mostly) will win people over. Because, in the wild world of prediction markets, trust is everything. And let’s be real, it’s probably going to be a bumpy ride. 🎢
Read More
- CNY JPY PREDICTION
- EUR HUF PREDICTION
- Is Bitcoin Playing Hard to Get? The Saucy Saga of Crypto’s Quiet Stage 🎩💼
- Launch Your Crypto Wallet Without the Headaches – Here’s How! 🤑
- CRV PREDICTION. CRV cryptocurrency
- XMR PREDICTION. XMR cryptocurrency
- EUR MXN PREDICTION
- ETH vs BTC: The Tortoise 🏎️ Finally Outruns the Hare? 🐢
- Bitcoin Queen’s Spectacular Fall: £5.5B Scam Bust! 😏👑💰
- EUR USD PREDICTION
2025-11-05 06:26