MicroStrategy & Bitcoin: A Love Affair Amid Market Meltdown 🐘💸

by

The audacious MicroStrategy, in a move so bold it makes a Cossack’s charge look timid, has once again plunged headfirst into the Bitcoin abyss-8,178 BTC for $835M! Their total stash now? A staggering 649,870 BTC. One might call it a “long-term strategy.” Or a midlife crisis. 🤷♂️

MicroStrategy, that most zealous of crypto enthusiasts, has executed another Bitcoin binge. They acquired 8,178 BTC (yes, really) for a princely sum of $835.6 million. The average price? A mere $102,171 per coin-though “mere” is perhaps too modest a word when one is tossing around eight-figure sums like confetti at a Cossack wedding. This was done during a market dip, which, to the uninitiated, is just a polite way of saying “prices fell slightly.”

MicroStrategy’s BTC Obsession: A Symphony of Accumulation 🎼

As the market flutters like a startled goose, MicroStrategy’s BTC yield soars at 27.8% annually in 2025. Their total holdings? 649,870 BTC, purchased for a cozy $48.37 billion at an average of $74,333 per coin. One might argue this is a “long-term strategy,” but who are we to question the wisdom of a company that sees Bitcoin as both savings account and existential purpose? 🧠💸

Related Reading: BTC News: Strategy Raises $715M to Buy More Bitcoin via Preferred Stock | Live Bitcoin News

MicroStrategy, in a week-ending spree on November 16, 2025, added 8,178 BTC to their hoard at $835.6 million. The average price? $102,171 per coin. Bitcoin’s price? A humble $94,000 at the time. Their total BTC stash now? 649,870. One might say they’ve achieved financial enlightenment-or perhaps they’ve simply forgotten how to stop. 🙌

Strategy acquired 8,178 BTC for ~$835.6M at ~$102,171 per coin, achieving a 27.8% BTC Yield YTD 2025. As of 11/16/2025, we hodl 649,870 BTC acquired for ~$48.37B at ~$74,433 per coin. A love letter to Bitcoin, if ever there was one. 💖

– Strategy (@Strategy)

How did they fund this? By selling preferred stock, of course-and not just any stock, but with a side of European investors! It’s a fiscal ballet, this Bitcoin obsession, and MicroStrategy is the lead dancer, twirling through market chaos with the grace of a man who’s never held a regular job. 💃🕺

As of November 16, 2025, their BTC count stands at 649,870-a figure so large it could fill a cathedral. The average purchase price? $74,332.39. One might call it a “diversified funding strategy,” though “diversified” feels like an understatement when your portfolio is 99% Bitcoin and 1% existential dread. 😬

This latest acquisition, with its lofty average price of $102,171, contrasts sharply with their earlier purchases. Yet, they press on, buying even as the market wobbles like a drunk Cossack at a tavern. Why? Because long-term strategy, of course. Or perhaps they’re simply addicted to the thrill of the chase. 🏃♂️💨

Market Chaos and MicroStrategy’s Stock: A Tragic Opera 🎭

Bitcoin’s recent slump (down below $95,000) is but a blip in the grand cosmic joke of finance. MicroStrategy, undeterred, continues to buy, proving their belief in Bitcoin’s long-term glory-or perhaps their belief in their own infallibility. Short-term volatility? A mere inconvenience, like a mosquito at a feast. 🦋

MicroStrategy’s stock, meanwhile, stumbled in pre-market trading, much like a drunkard’s first step. Investors, ever the fickle bunch, reacted with a mix of awe and terror. Some see this as opportunistic genius; others, a recipe for disaster. Either way, the drama continues. 🎬

And yet, this acquisition cements MicroStrategy as one of the corporate world’s most ardent Bitcoin lovers. Their treasury management? A masterclass in eccentricity. Or perhaps a warning. Only time will tell. ⏳

In a market correction, where prices dip like a Cossack’s hat in a rainstorm, MicroStrategy’s Bitcoin accumulation reads like a fairy tale-equal parts madness and magic. Whether it’s a masterstroke or a midlife crisis, only history will judge. But until then, we’ll keep watching, popcorn in hand. 🍿

Read More

2025-11-17 20:22