A certain market oracle, one Jurrien Timmer, Director of Global Macro at Fidelity, has deigned to grace us with his insights on X (formerly the avian haven of Twitter). His proclamation? The hedging fiesta against the dollar’s lamentable devaluation and inflation’s voracious appetite may soon be but a memory. 🍾✨
Oh, the spectacle of it all! Once, Finns wagered mere pennies on the flutter of a reindeer’s ear. Now, we trade digital phantoms called “Bitcoin” and “Ethereum” as if they were tokens at a St. Petersburg fair. I’ve watched this circus grow from a sideshow into the main event, complete with clowns, acrobats, and the occasional unexplained disappearance of one’s life savings. 🤹♂️💸
And what is this latest calamity? A Death Cross, no less! 🦴✝️ The 200-day EMA, with the grace of a nosy landlady, has crossed above the 50-day EMA, signaling the end of HBAR’s bullish masquerade. Alas, the Golden Cross of yesteryear is but a distant memory, like a forgotten feast in a mirthless village.
Recent whispers from Arkham (not the Batman villain, but equally mysterious) reveal that Coinbase, in its infinite wisdom or perhaps playful mischief, hosted a staggering 1,265,207,242,406 SHIB – roughly $12.7 million of the digital fluff, sashaying back and forth over merely two days. And what a spectacle! Instead of one grand gesture, the coins exchanged hands in several grand, bewildering acts: 551.6 billion, 414.8 billion, 240.5 billion, 238.6 billion, and 220.4 billion. Sequential, insatiable, perhaps a touch obsessive. All the while, Coinbase held the reins, as if the whole affair was some elaborate puppet show. 🤹♂️
Quick Facts:
The morning feed is basically a crypto version of a reality show: Ripple’s Chris Larsen selling $764 million in XRP (and still sitting on $9 billion), JPMorgan giving Bitcoin a VIP pass to Wall Street, and Elon Musk’s Tesla making $80 million from a stash it never touched. 🤯💎
According to the South China Morning Post (aka the gossip column of the financial world), if these two regions team up, Asia’s crypto scene could go from “meh” to “marvelous.” 🌟 But let’s be real, China’s ban on crypto since 2021 has been about as effective as a screen door on a submarine. 🚪💦
Solana’s adoption, a slow but steady march, continues with 15.7M $SOL – a mere 2.86% of its total supply – locked away in treasuries across 13 entities, spanning three countries. Institutional love, or just a fling? Only time will tell, darling. 💼
It is with no small degree of astonishment that we report the event of a miner, employing a modest $300 setup, who, against all odds, managed to strike a Bitcoin block worth a rather staggering $347,000. This remarkable feat was achieved through the Solo CK Pool, a platform not often associated with such grand success, … Read more
