Schiff Slays Bitcoin: Gold Tokens on Blockchain Win! 😏

The outspoken bitcoin basher and gold gazer extraordinaire, Peter Schiff, has dashed off again to proclaim that the yellow stuff-not those crypto curiosities-is the sole sensible chap to shove onto a blockchain. In a recent chinwag, Schiff merrily maintained that tokenized gold could prance about as a medium, unit, and store-roles he says bitcoin (BTC) chats glibly about but botches utterly. 😂

Gold’s $2.1T Meltdown: Digital vs. Physical Showdown 🌍💰

Thus, the market capitalization of gold, that colossal treasure, dwindled by a staggering $2.1 trillion in a single day-a sum so vast it could have funded the ambitions of a thousand empires, yet it vanished as swiftly as a candle’s flame in the wind. Such a loss, exceeding half the total value of the cryptocurrency realm, has ignited a fervent debate among the learned and the foolish alike: is the digital gold, that ephemeral phantom of the modern age, a more steadfast guardian of wealth than its physical counterpart? 🤔

Ripple’s Secret Army of XRP Treasurers: 11 and Counting!

Crypto researcher BD, ever the dramatist, revealed there are now 11 XRP treasury companies. Evernorth is on course to be the largest public XRP holder, planning to raise a staggering $1 billion-because nothing says “confidence” like buying a cryptocurrency with a legal battle. 💰💸

Cardano’s Domain Domination: Ada or Bust? 🚀

In a forum proclamation dated 21 October 2025, the Foundation declared its intent to submit applications in Q1 2026, financing the venture with the audacity of a poet funding a symphony. “The Cardano Foundation plans to apply for the .ada and .cardano gTLDs,” it proclaimed, as if the web itself were a blank canvas awaiting its brushstroke. 🎨

ETH’s $4.5K Dream: Will It Rise or Crash? 🚀💰

Ethereum is trading near $3,896 on October 23, 2025, holding between $3,700 and $4,000. While the broader crypto scene stays cautious, Ethereum is quietly gaining steam. Like a determined mule, it’s plodding along, refusing to be left behind. 🐴

Trump Pardon for Binance Boss? The Crazy Crypto Saga Gets Wilder

Apparently, Zhao was caught up in some money laundering drama-because what’s crypto without a little illicit fun?-and the U.S. decided a four-month stint was enough. He’s out, applause for everyone. CNBC spilled the beans, citing a White House statement that basically said, “Hey, we’re doing this because it’s fun, and also, the Biden folks are mildly annoyed.”

Monero’s Moon Mission: $420 or Bust? 🚀💸

Monero (XMR), the phantom of the crypto opera, continues its aria of strength. 🎭 Its retest of $240, a dramatic pause, was met with a bullish crescendo, a chorus of weekly candles that roar, “Encore! Encore!” 🦁 The higher highs, the higher lows-a symphony of structure, positioning our hero for a grand finale at the yearly high.