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Bitcoin (BTC) has made a modest leap, up by 1.21% in the last 24 hours. Not bad for an old-timer that loves to make you sweat. 🤔

Monero (XMR), the phantom of the crypto opera, continues its aria of strength. 🎭 Its retest of $240, a dramatic pause, was met with a bullish crescendo, a chorus of weekly candles that roar, “Encore! Encore!” 🦁 The higher highs, the higher lows-a symphony of structure, positioning our hero for a grand finale at the yearly high.

Cryptocurrency, that elusive digital unicorn, is also in the crosshairs. The EU is determined to stop Russia from using it to bypass sanctions, because nothing says “we mean business” like cutting off their access to Bitcoin and its cousins. 🦄💰

Bitcoin (BTC), once soaring at $109,500 on this fateful day, October 23, has since tumbled from its year-to-date high of $126,200, shedding billions like autumn leaves in a tempest. 🍂💔 A glance at the weekly chart reveals a tapestry of bearish patterns, each more ominous than the last, foretelling a descent into the abyss of $60,000.

This is the most blistering critique of Saylor that comes from Giustra after the two took part in a viral altercation back in 2021. A spectacle as entertaining as a country ball, though far less graceful. 💃

Lo! The Dutch gambling realm has been upended, as if the devil himself had danced through its halls with a quill and a ledger. The Remote Gambling Act, that most inscrutable of decrees, and the CRUKS exclusion system, a digital purgatory, have reshaped the landscape with the subtlety of a thunderclap. Licensed operators now tether themselves to CRUKS, casting a shadow over those who dare to play, for the system blocks them with the finality of a tombstone. 🪦

But the real star of this three-ring circus? HYPE, which shot up 12% faster than a rocket with a lit match. Why? HyperLiquid Strategies is planning to raise a cool $1 billion to buy the token. Because nothing says “financial prudence” like throwing a billion bucks at a volatile asset. 🤡

The agreement, crafted in Brussels amid weeks of deliberation so profound it could have been mistaken for a religious rite, targets Moscow’s energy sector with a ban on Russian liquefied natural gas (LNG) imports. Meanwhile, trade and travel restrictions expand like a poorly kept secret.

$230 million vanished, courtesy of Lazarus Group, leaving users with empty wallets and existential crises. Lawsuits bloomed like wildflowers, and regulators circled like vultures. 🕊️💥

In what can only be affectionately termed as a peculiar bonding exercise, the WazirX team has taken to referring to its users as a “tribe.” It’s a term usually reserved for people who have never been Facebook friends, but who knows? This digital tribe is rallying behind this pledge of perpetual zero-fee trading, turning the platform into a curious oasis in the sometimes desolate desert that is the cryptocurrency exchange landscape. It’s the sort of commitment that even the most grizzled of crypto traders struggle to spit out without a knowing smirk.