S&P 500 Snubbed Me… Again! 😤 #RobinhoodWoes #BitcoinBlues

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So I’m sitting here, sipping my overpriced coffee, thinking, “Hey, maybe this time the S&P 500 will finally acknowledge my existence!” But nooo, they had to pick Interactive Brokers instead. Who even is that guy? I’m Robinhood! I’m the guy who let people trade on their phones while eating cereal in their pajamas! 🤷♂️

Robinhood’s shares dropped 1.26% because apparently, the market thinks I’m not “index-worthy.” Meanwhile, Interactive Brokers is up 4.29% because they probably wear a suit and tie to work. Unfair. I wear a hoodie and a frown. 🤷♂️💸

And Strategy? Oh, they got snubbed too. “Strategy” is just a fancy name for a company that buys Bitcoin like it’s Black Friday. Their shares fell 4.17% because the S&P 500 is clearly allergic to anything that smells like crypto. 🙄

Bitcoin? It’s basically a yo-yo now. “Oh, it’s going to $150k!” “No, it’s not!” I’m just trying to hold onto my BTC like it’s my last hope for financial freedom. Michael Saylor’s company bought 3,081 BTC for $356.9 million. That’s like buying 3,081 fancy cars. But who needs cars when you can have crypto? 🚗➡️Ƀ

“Strategy has achieved a 25.4% BTC Yield YTD. That’s like getting a 25% discount on my rent… if my landlord accepted crypto. Which they don’t. Still owe them $2,500. Thanks, S&P.” – Larry David (as Strategy) August 25, 2025

And let’s talk about this Bitcoin accumulation. “3,666 BTC in August alone!” Wow, that’s… less than last month. I’m not even mad. I’m just sad. 🤷♂️📉

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2025-08-26 14:59