Strategy CEO’s Bitcoin Oath: We Hold, We Don’t Sell – Only Dream of the Day We Might?

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Oh, Fong Lee, the soothsayer of the crypto cosmos, gently reminds us all: “Relax, peasants.” To those jaw-dropped folks still pondering whether Strategy might, dare I say, dump its beloved Bitcoin-calm your trembling hands. That’s about as likely as pigs sprouting wings and learning to fly. 🐖✈️

Behold the sacred last page of the playbook-no secrets here, just pure, unadulterated Hodl theology.

  • Fong Lee, the oracle, doubles down on Strategy’s unwavering devotion to Bitcoin-maximalist to the bone.
  • To sell? Only during the grand, apocalyptic, multi-year meltdown-think of it as the crypto version of “Oops, all oranges, in the year 2029.”
  • Meanwhile, the firm’s shiny new perpetual preferred shares? A capital engine so cunning, even the Wall Street wizards are temporarily baffled. “Stand back, mortals,” he seems to say.

Months ago, on some podcast, Fong quivered at the thought of selling Bitcoin-funding dividends with the very asset that comprises their heart and wallet. Yet, lo and behold, Strategy pulled a ‘tough guy’ move: no satoshis for sale. Instead, they amassed a staggering $1.44 billion cash fortress, enough to keep dividend payments flowing until eternity-or at least two years. And the holdings? A mighty 650,000 BTC-more than 3% of all Bitcoin in existence. That’s the kind of number that would make ETFs giggle behind their hands.

In a Yahoo Finance tête-à-tête, Fong declared: “We don’t trade Bitcoin. We accumulate it. Price agnostic.” Translation: patent our patience, wait for the market to hilariously fluctuate, and keep stacking. Volatility? Just a game for spectators, not players. Strategy’s in it for the long, long haul. 🚀💰

2029: The Distant Dream of Liquidation

Should the universe conspire to crush both Bitcoin and Strategy’s valuation under its cosmic heel-well, then, maybe they’d consider liquidating. But that’s a 2029 problem, not a 2025 nuisance, as Fong so optimistic-yet cautiously-predicts.

The wizard’s wand? Perpetual preferred shares, a magical financing tool hiding its power from the market’s naive gaze. Give it a year or two, he advises, and they’ll understand why these shares are more than just paper-they’re a self-sustaining, shareholder-evading, BTC-fueling machine.

The Growing Horde of Competitors

Meanwhile, JPMorgan and Morgan Stanley roll out shiny new Bitcoin-linked “investments” – like spicy, leveraged little notes tied to ETFs, diluting Strategy’s exclusive club of hardcore Hodlers. These new offerings? Capped upsides, capped downsides-kind of like crypto on training wheels, challenging Strategy’s pristine image as the OG Bitcoin hoarder.

And oh, the drama: short-seller Jim Chanos whispering of long Bitcoin, short Strategy-an elegant ballet of market mischief. JPMorgan further tightens margins, as if to say, “Try us, fools.” A rival firm, Metaplanet, eyes the treasure chest with envy and introduces a capital raise, drawing the eyes of MSCI itself.

As these titans tinker and tussle, the question lingers: is Strategy still the titan of corporate Bitcoin, or merely a gracefully aging monarch in a kingdom reshaped by giants? The crypto chessboard is crowded, my friend-watch this space for the next move.

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2025-12-04 01:15